can't win, won't lose
by rexgrimm
Summary: Fitz has been fighting for so long, fighting jerks and fighting underground trying to win enough to support him and his friend Bianca. After being betrayed so much can someone new come along and make things better,or worse? Elitz M for violence & language
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1:

It had been a while since he lost a fight.

When Degrassi became abandoned, they tore it down to make it a warehouse for goods. That was where his fights in the underground league took place. His name was Fitz and was the only out-of-the-closet gay guy in the league. He is aiming to be the best of all of the fighters.

Of course he needs to get serious, he never goes there other than the days he has to so he could fight. He knows nothing about his opponents. Fitz may love a good fight, but the whole thing just disgusts him. He only took the job so he could pay rent since he was kicked out of his parents' house. Maybe it was because he was gay, maybe it was because he had been to jail too much. Either way, he lived with his friend Bianca, barely making it check to check; trying to make ends meet with fighting and trying to keep Bianca safe.

Because ever since Bianca got kicked out, he felt it was his job to take care of her. That's how they got here today, with Fitz on the ground knocked out because he just lost to the reigning champ: Spinner Mason.

This would go terribly for him and he knew it. He only fought for the pay and when you lose, there's no "you tried your best" consolation prize; no, you go home empty handed! He tried to get other jobs, however this was the only one he managed to keep. Without the money, he'd need to try to get another part time job to make ends meet.

However, just as he starts to wallow in self pity, he hears the champion start to make an announcement

"Hey, let's hear a round of applause for this guy here! He lasted long and had a good left hook too!" Spinner said loudly since there was no microphone.

Fitz thinks that it's amazing how it's hard to be mad at this guy even though he just whooped his ass!

"Anyway, I have to quit the league," he said, and there was a big rush if complaints and boos from the audience. "Only because I'm getting married!" And half off the crowd cheered when he said this, but the other half was still disappointed until he said "And she's hot!" Everyone burst into loud cheers, even Fitz chuckled a little. His thoughts were that the guy was cute! Then he realized at the same time Spinner said:" Which means my titles up for grabs there will be a tournament before the month ends for it." The crowd—already on their feet, since there were no chairs in the arena—started cheering louder than before.

Fitz made his way to the table, grabbed a pen and signed up for the event. He could do this; he was the best fighter in this league. After all, the easiest way to become the best fighter is to defeat everyone else. And that was exactly what he planned on doing.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: Finding a fight

*Punch* *Punch* *Pant* *Pant*

After training at the gym for several hours, Fitz had gotten used to this rhythm. He knows he is strong; however he just can't find the right fighting style. Everyone knew how predictable his fighting style was and he was getting pissed off because no matter how much he trained, every time he got into a fight he would just go nuts throwing fists and kicks rapidly at the opponent with no direction. "How the hell did I get this far?" Fitz asked himself and every time he asked this it was because he had to take care of himself and his best friend Bianca. She works at a diner and he fights, they do the best they can. "Damn, might as well go out and do something." Fitz says as he grabs his stuff and walks out the gym wishing things hadn't gotten to this point. He was going to face opponents with twice the experience and strength this was practically a suicide mission. The fight was gonna be tonight and he wasn't ready! "I hope I win this one" Fitz whispers "You will" a voice says and as Fitz turns around he sees it's Bianca and smiles. "you were late picking me up from work so I figured you would be here, come on Fitz let's go!" Bianca says rushing Fitz out of the Gym "I got you a date" and as Bianca says this Fitz' eyes open wide "Oh not this again!" he groans.

After two hours of dealing with Bianca nagging him about looking good and how to dress, Fitz just wore a grey button down shirt and jeans ignoring Bianca's comments. "Bianca would you please calm down I'll do fine damn I'm not five" and she sighs and says "Sorry you've done a lot for me and I want you to be happy!" "Well you could start by shutting up and not going to the bar tonight you've got a doctor's appointment tomorrow and you know how naggy he gets." Fitz replied "But I hate the doctor, ugh your such a mom!" Bianca said jokingly "Well if I was a mom I wouldn't be getting it in tonight!" Fitz says sending her joke right back at her and then Bianca says "EW! Not in our bed Fitz!" and Fitz walks away chuckling and out the door and sits on the bus stop, yes the bus stop because they cannot afford a car. Fitz laughs to himself thinking how funny it is how he is taking the bus to a date. As he's waiting he watches the people walking by wondering what they are thinking, before he would have made fun of all of them. That all changed when he had to take care of Bianca. Also the anger management meds help sometimes too. Fitz turns as he hears the bus stop and climbs aboard as the doors opened taking in the stench of homeless people and garbage.

He took out an air freshener tree like the ones in cars and put it around his neck hoping it would save him from the contagious and disgusting smell of the bus. It sounded ridiculous, however this actually worked many times! Even if the person he went on the date with asked why he smelled of forest pine. Good times, good times.

There's this woman sitting with a kid who looks about 5 and they look uncomfortable and scared which Fitz finds odd as he scours the bus looking at his fellow riders bored as hell. He sees one old guy asleep, a mom arguing with her kids to shut up, the aforementioned woman and child who are uncomfortable and that's it. By now Fitz is bored out of his mind and as his stop approaches he thanks god and bolts out the doors.

The site of the date is basically the diner where Bianca works at, Bianca actually tried to be the waitress of their date but Fitz forced her to switch shifts. Fitz knew Bianca had a history of being nosy and saying what she thinks which had ruined some of his dates in the past.

As Fitz entered the Diner he saw the boy Bianca had described: spiky hair, darkish skin, very skinny and cute as hell! "Zane?" Fitz asked and he nodded "Fitz?" and Fitz nodded in return as he sat down and smiled at his date Zane. "So do you come here often?"Zane asks and Fitz nods "Yeah this is one of my favorite diners I come and see Bianca at lunch" and Zane smiles saying "Very committed I like that in a man" and winks. With this Fitz almost laughs, thinking that Bianca set him up with another cornball. "Now time to get serious!" he says folding his hands and leaning on them Zane asks "How's the ice cream" and Fitz chuckles a bit and says "Awesome, speaking of the deserts here you have to dry the pie" Fitz says getting a little to hyped up, he loved talking about food especially when it tasted good!

_-Bang- _

Hearing the slam on their table interrupting his thoughts he looks up and see some guy he doesn't know "Hey princesses could you calm down the drama club over here? I'm trying to eat here, but I all I can hear is a freaking play rehearsal" the ass of a stranger says pissing off Fitz entirely and he stands up "Hey asshole, guess what?" Fitz asks "What?" the guy says arrogantly and Fitz slams the guys head on the table. "That's what asshole" and then his friends at the other table glare in amazement and Fitz realizes he forget to take his anger management meds. "Oops, things just got a lot more awkward in here" Fitz says and Zane replies "Dude you don't hit homophobic people it makes them worse! I'm out of here!" and with that Zane leaves. As soon as Zane leaves the stranger's friends approach him with all angry expressions. "Damn, I got into more trouble" Fitz mutters and as they all prepare to fight a single man walks out and says "hello I'm Owen, the one you just slammed on a table! Now without the sucker punches I will whip your ass! I came to scope out the competition for the tournament for the championship and fount an angry little fairy who got his pixie dust in a whirl" Owen says smiling as he sees Fitz' obvious anger and Fitz lunges at Owen who sidesteps and trips Fitz. Fitz proceeds to fall flat on his face being humiliated he stands back up and focuses. "Okay Fitz just like you practiced" Fitz mutters, then Owen slams his fist into Fitz' jaw almost knocking him out. While in this state Fitz remembers a situation like this a long time ago with his father:

_Flashback:_

"_Ow, dad that hurts!" Fitz yells "I know I have to teach ya have to fight so you don't get beat up in the future! Do you wanna be a boxer when you grow up or what? Remember use your opponents strength against him!" and with that Fitz' father came running at him and Fitz threw him on the ground using his own momentum against him and making him fall virtually winning the fight in his mind. "Good job, you're a great kid. Soon you'll grow up and be something good not like your parents!"_

Remembering how it sounds abusive but he was wearing safety gear and this was only 5 years ago when he was 13. He had always wanted to be a boxer and I guess the outcome was ironic. Then he was brought back into reality in which his mind wandering felt like minutes it had been seconds and Fitz was still in a fight. "Hey tinkerbell, coming back down from neverland anytime soon?" and smirks then Fitz says "I think you watch a bit too much Disney channel! What are you five?" then it was Owen's turn to be aggravated as he runs towards Fitz ready to punch the living daylights out of him saying "Can a five year old punch like this?" and then Fitz moves out the way and pushes Owen's head towards to floor and jokes "No, but a five year old can fall like that." with this Owen stood up and tried to tackle Fitz, but met a fist to the face then the stomach and finally he stepped on Owen's foot pushing him backwards. As Owen fell due to the lack of balance Fitz smiled and realized he had finally gotten his mojo back!

**A/N: sorry for not writing last week stuff happened … anyway I'll try to make the next chapter better and there will be more drama next chapter :P hope you enjoyed it any suggestions about my writing please review and I'll try to make the chapters longer like my other story. **


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi and I should probably do theses thingies more often or I'll get in trouble!

Chapter 3:

-slam-

"Damn it!" a young man screams sitting at his favorite restaurant, the dot. He's dressed in grey hood and a black tee baggy and dull. "Adam, just calm down dude!" and with that the person knew his saying this would make things worse. Adam tugs at the sleeves of his grey hood and says "How am I supposed to calm down when I send one of my men to spy on the competition for the tournament and he goes and get's his ass whooped! Ugh I work with idiots!"

Adam says wondering why he got into this business in the first place having somewhat of a flashback remembering how the bastards at Degrassi wouldn't let him fight because of his body. Thus he sought to find fighters to support him in his plight to undermine the whole fighting club by becoming the champion. This seemed like an awesome plan until he discovered everyone that joined him were useless blockheads!

"Adam you know I don't approve of this anyhow, but maybe it's time you switched tactics" the boy opposite him says "Shut up Drew, you know I have to do this it's my duty! Besides what else am I supposed to do?" and with this comment from Adam his bigger brother shuts up remembering who got him into this mess in the first place. It started when Drew got into a car accident with their mother and the results were traumatic, he was in a coma for a month and their mom suffers from post traumatic stress disorder. This happened when she discovered the other driver and passengers died and she was over stuck with guilt. With both his brother and mother in bad health Adam couldn't bear to leave them for college so he became a dropout for them. Being the insane woman as usual their mother became mad, and with more added on guilt she's gone quite mad. Things went spiraling down from there and that's how he is now who he is, which I someone who Is just a few steps from being a gang leader.

Considering his past Adam then remembers one thing "I have a new idea thanks bro" Adam says rushing out the diner in a rush. "Here's your check" the waitress says and hands him the paper and he says "Damn now I've gotta pay"

Fitz just managed to escape from the Diner as the cops arrive hearing about the fight from a random call from a bystander. Fitz hoped he wouldn't get caught for fighting again, it was a tiresome process and didn't need to be arrested at this time while preparing for the most important series of fights yet. When he got home he got nagged for ruining the date Bianca set up for him and as he tuned her out he wished he could find someone like him. Someone not afraid to fight back and stick up for something, instead of just handling the ignorant comments of jerks who have nothing better to do. Reminded of jerks, he thinks of what that idiot Owen said between his jackass jokes that he was spying on him for the tournament, creepy how easy he was to find. Besides that with all his nervousness Fitz had trouble sleeping and when he finally did sleep he was thrown into a nightmare:

_A mysterious figure comes out and pinches Fitz I the face "Ow damn what the hell!" and as he punches back the dark silhouette doesn't even bat an eye. As the mysterious opponent laughs he says "You will never win your not good enough! You yourself now this no matter how many petty fights you win your not good enough for anything just like your father said!" and this pissed of Fitz so much that he lunged at him in his dream._

"OW!" Fitz yelled waking up from his dream on the floor. "Damn I'm getting into fights in my dreams now too whoa I think I'm starting to get a bit too violent!" Fitz cursed to himself. "Oh so your just realizing this now?" Bianca says jokingly and earns a jump from Fitz "HEY! You scared me you don't sneak up on people in the night!" he yells "And hearing someone screaming in their sleep and getting yelled at isn't fun at night either now is it? What's wrong?" Bianca retaliates and with this Fitz rolls his eyes and says " whatever eff off I'm fine" and Bianca screams "No you're not I know you, now stop being an asshole all the time and always getting into fights! You are mad all the time even when you don't act like it I know it now I have just one question. Why are you so damn angry!" and Fitz' fists tighten the truth had hurt him more than the punches he takes all the time and fueled with anger he walks out and slams the door leaving Bianca's question hanging in the air.

As Fitz walks out into the night and as he walks in the cold night air with no direction but to get away he sees a dark silhouette.

"Well hello there Mr. Fitzgerald I've heard a lot about you!" the stranger says leaving Fitz's mind blank and he stutters "Who the hell are you?" and then the stranger says "You may not know me but I know a lot about you enough to know that you're a great fighter and like to talk with your fists, well why don't we have a nice conversation?" the stranger says smiling and Fitz hesitates thinking of his nightmare…. Could he risk another fight and could he win? "No thanks" Fitz says and starts to walk off. "Oh I wasn't asking!" and then the stranger hurls himself at Fitz and as Fitz thinks back he thinks about what happened with Bianca, "Well she says she's tired of my rage, time for some anger management" Fitz mutters as he rushes at his opponent ready to fight!

**A/N: sorry for not updating earlier! I think this chapter could be better comparing to last chapter! Review and comment with advice and stuff please and hope you enjoyed it :D**


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I own a few things, however Degrassi isn't one of them

Chapter 4:

As Fitz rushes towards his opponent he notices it's a scrawny boy who looks oddly familiar. He dodges the tackling foes attack and when he sees his opponent about to fall he grabs him by the back of his shirt accidentally opening the buttons revealing a black tang top and white wrapping around his… wait what he has boobs, or is he a she? Or is she a he, and as Fitz boggles his mind on this he is reminded that there was a transgendered kid in his high school. Wait a second his name was "Adam!" Fitz says to check and then the stranger says "Yes? Oh wait, damn I've been discovered!" so it was Adam and as Fitz gets curious as to why a boy from his past is just showing up Adam almost reading his mind yells "How dare you make a fool of me by fighting one of my men! We are gonna take over that stupid fighting club!" and runs at Fitz. Fitz steps to the side and throws Adam's shirt on his head. This fight reminding him off his days of being a jerk in high school, when he found Jesus and when he found out he was gay and all that other nostalgic stuff. Adam was pissed off and came at him one more time and as he dodged it another time he flicked him and started walking away. "Where are you going?" Adam questioned angrily and Fitz ignored the question and went back into his apartment building ignoring the shouts coming from outside. Feeling the boys anger he realized how stupidly he had acted when he fought with Adam if you could call that fighting so he was on his way to go apologize which he rarely did, which was mostly because most of the times when he did things he believed he had a good reason. What was happening lately has been making him go nuts, especially since he was having doubts about if he was gonna win, but whatever it's time he stopped going nuts all the time. Speaking of nuts he wondered where Adam had gone.

Adam was angry as he stumbled into his house and picked up the phone and dialed a number. He tapped his foot impatiently as it rang and was pissed when it went to voice mail, but then he remembered how late it was. He then hung up and sat down on the couch in their now apartment and he remembered when he used to have a house, but all the bills and damage from the accident nearly bankrupted us so we had to downgrade, a lot. Everything about the place irked him, the drapes, the ceiling the furniture hell even the door bothered him. It was all so dirty and dark and it pissed him off, then the phone rang distracting him from his thoughts and then he ran to pick it up and a voice on the other line said "Yes?" and with that Adam start speaking so fast that even he himself was a bit confused at what he was saying and then the voice on the other line said, "Whoa dude calm down, lay off the red bull and tell me what happened." And then Adam told the man on the phone everything. Including the fight at the diner between Owen and Fitz, the fight between Fitz and himself and as he finished the never ending rant of his there was silence. "Hello?" Adam asked and the person said "What am I supposed to do about this Adam? You know things have been hectic!" and Adam sighs and continues "Dude you are the best fighter I know and it's been two years since we've talked! I know you are sad and stuff but this could be exactly what you need bro!" then the guy chuckled and said "Fine, it's Fitz right? I guess I should come back and finish our rivalry!" and as Adam heard that he smiled and said "Thanks Eli".

**A/N: oh snap! Drama! I bet you didn't see that coming! Or maybe you did I'm not psychic so yeah sorry I have not updated in a while I shall attempt to update more often and make these chapters better so I hope you like the drama and my corny cliffhanger! Please review and all that stuff :D!**


	5. surpise guests

Disclaimer: I do not own Degrassi and all that other stuff don't sue me okay? lol

Chapter 5:

After seeing a person from his past Fitz decided to look back into his past just in case any other surprising things from his past. As he rummaged through his closet and got nothing as Bianca walked in. "Trying to find yourself?" Bianca joked and he said "Ha ha very funny, but hey do you have any idea where my yearbook is?" and she chuckled and said "What would you need that for, never mind I don't want to know I promised when we made up I'd stay out your business. It's in the drawer to the left of the bed." Bianca said and walked away. As Fitz opened the drawer he confirmed what Bianca said and found the yearbook. As he flipped through the pages he remembered his awkward youth and all the phases he went through and then he came to one name Adam Torres and said, "looks like I found a name okay, now to just ask around" and as he went to close the book he accidentally shot a few pages over and found a name that was oh so familiar. The name of a rival he once had in high school that had brought out his darker side. _Elijah Goldsworthy _he didn't even remember what brought him to pull the hood ornament off of that boy's car. Or why he allowed things to get so far.

All that was happening was something that was really confusing him at the time and he didn't know if he it was because maybe he liked Eli or extremely hated him, that he kept the war going. Fitz had one day realized it was that he liked Eli and that was what ultimately stopped him from killing him, and when he realized he couldn't go out with Eli he settled for Clare when Eli got to possessive. He realized then that he was you know…. Into guys. He tried to do what Riley did at first and try to ignore it b He tried to do what Riley did at first and try to ignore it b furthering the war, but there was no doubt he was in love. It pretty much drove him crazy and Bianca knowing him so well eventually found out, and was eventually okay with it. Now Fitz was having enough nostalgia for one day and decided to close the book, then almost on cue the doorbell to the apartment rang and Fitz walked out to the door and saw an empty hallway as he stepped out he saw none other than Eli Goldsworthy himself, so much for no more nostalgia. Only one sentence was spoken from the darker haired boy who said "Remember me?" and those cliché words echoed and rung through his ears. What the hell was with the past coming back to him, first Owen, then Adam, now Eli who the hell was next Clare? "I was in town and decided to see if I could find you. Would you like to go grab a bite? I have to talk to you about a lot of stuff" and feeling he had no other choice he said fine grabbed a coat and went outside to lunch with his ex-rival oh what a joy that could be, or not Fitz thought sarcastically and headed towards the dot with Eli.

… Meanwhile Drama shows up elsewhere…..

She had just gotten off of the bus, her friend had asked her to arrive to support her new fashion/make up show in her old home town. Being best friend with a famous person could be a bit of a drag and decrease your intelligence as well, however it sucks that she had to find out this way, she discovered among other things that her ex-boyfriend the love of her life, was here in town and this fashion show was her perfect chance to track him down! His name was Eli and in case you hadn't guessed she was Clare on her way in to see her best friend Alli's fashion show. Clare had become a very well known lawyer who could talk anyone out of almost anything and even wrote a fictional mystery book. All her fame and persuasion, however could not persuade Eli to get back with her no matter how hard she tried and he had some silly delusion that they weren't meant to be, but he was oh so wrong and she would prove it to him while she was here. If it was the last thing she did.

… Back to previous drama….

"Thank you Fitz" Eli says as Fitz and Eli get to the dot and having his curiosity peaked Fitz asks "Umm what are you talking about?" and Eli chuckles "Well if it wasn't for you me and Clare would have never broken up, and I would never have realized we were not meant to be! She stalks me endlessly, but at least I got away from her before anything else happened.

-bang-

It happens like a flash and Fitz is knocked over by a soda can to the head "OW!" Fitz mutters in pain and he sees the one who threw the can was non-other than Clare Edwards "Just like that" Eli says following up on his previous statement and Clare starts running towards Fitz and screams "Get away from him! Don't hurt Eli!" and Clare starts throwing stuff at Fitz and Fitz thinks why the hell did he come here and he knew the day could only get worse from where he's at now!


End file.
